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Tuesday, October 04, 2011

I just want to work out!!!


My gripe list is short. Well sometimes I might be lying, but outside of traffic nightmares and pollution I seem to be meshing okay to the brazilian style of life living. However when it comes to the gym I am hard pressed to think the transition will ever happen.

Most brazilian gyms (mine and those of friends) have the so called 'professor," which is a quasi personal trainer. My gym is decent sized so depending on the hour we usually have between 1-3 to pace the floor eager to assist you in reaching your fitness goals. At first I thought, great a free trainer (even though you definately pay for it and you can't opt out) that can help motivate me through the boredom I get after about 45 minutes. But that isn't realllllly what they do. They should be called gym buddies. Can't find a friend to chat next to you on the elliptical? Never fear, your professor is here! They chat and chat and chat and this chatting has no barriers. Like when you are the ground doing abs, running on the treadmill or really just looking to be fully engaged with your ipod and magazine obviously not in the mood to giggle and gossip, they happily come over to interrupt with curiosity to know exactly what you are thinking, what you did last weekend and what you plan on doing this coming weekend. Okay, so its great portuguese practice but at this point there is still a lot of pictionary going on when the words are coming. So with me there is usually a lot of standing and watching, but RIGHT NEXT TO ME, waiting for one of us to understand what the other is trying to say.

But brazilians love this attention and know no different. I even try to follow the greeting rules when I arrive, kisses on the cheeks to the 'professor(s)' and the long drawn out 'how are you' which always goes a little something like this: "Hey, how are you? Great, how are you? Great! Thats great! Im so glad everything is great for you? Yes and I am so glad everything is great for you too! Great! Great, ok see you soon (more like in 5 min). Great!!!" But then I like to retreat to the treadmill and be left alone.

Ohh no I didn't. I didn't just attempt to ignore the professors as they make their rounds to make sure everyone is STILL GREAT. Like today for example, I tried so hard to just do a quick walk in, work out and go and I was stopped as I tried to quickly hurry out, if everything was ok? I looked sad? I looked upset? What is the matter? NO, I am not upset, just in a hurry to beat this storm and get to the grocery store. Ohhhhh ok so "how are you? Great! How are you? Great! How was your weekend? What did you do?..........ETC

AARRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG leave me alone, I just want to work out!!!!!

Here ends rant. 

4 comments:

Unknown said...

Hilarious! Reminds me of when I lived in The South (USA).

American Heart Brazilian Soul said...

Ha!LOL...
Sorry, you made me laugh out loud.
I can totally picture what you are describing.
"We" ( Brazilians ) are super social animals, and the gym is a precious socializing opportunity for many people.
I think there is nothing wrong if you just tell "anyone" approaching and "slowing you down", that you would love to chat with them, but you are in a real hurry. :)
You can use this classic line "we" Brazilians always use in the situation you just described "A conversa esta muito boa, mas eu realmente estou super com pressa", that should give a fair warning that there is nothing wrong and you are just in a real hurry. :)
Try it and let me know the results ;)

Ray

Alex said...

HAHAHAHA this is so funny and I can just picture the super drawn out "ahhhhhhhhhh que boooooo00000mmmmmmmmmmm!!! OTIMO! "

I personally love this and it puts a huge smile on my face but I can see how when you are rushed how it could be a little bit annoying because you have to get somewhere.

Beijos,
Alex

Born Again Brazilian said...

HA! Uh oh. I'm going to the gym for the first time in Brazil tomorrow. Just for a week of "experimentar." I wonder if they will waste time with me, or wait until I pay. But I definitely like to be alone in my thoughts when I work out, so that would be "nao bom."

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